Jimmo (James Ignatius Malachi Obadiah Osbourne) is an alien abduction survivor. Grays are everywhere – you can recognise them by certain bodily features, and if you listen closely you can hear the whir of the servos in their leg gear (they can’t handle earth’s gravity with their spindly legs).
In an effort to get away from the Grays, Jimmo finds himself in Della, where he discovers the mother of all alien bases.This is the source of all the world’s problems. And he finally learns how to keep the little bastards at bay.
Netgalley and Perseid Press provided this advanced copy in exchange for an honest review. And honestly, I really didn’t like this book. I don’t like bagging anything – writing is a hard job and takes a long time. But this one was honestly a stinker.
I think the description would have been better if it had been along the lines of “delusional rantings of paranoid schizophrenic including too many male focused/fantasy sex scenes”.
The book is ostensibly told by Jimmo to an award winning journalist, who has tried to keep Jimmo’s “unique voice”. Jimmo’s unique voice was simply rambling with lots of painfully bad grammar. (“Should of” being used rather than “should have” is one of my pet peeves, and it was included in spades). The plot was sadly lacking – Jimmo travels around trying to avoid the Alien Occupation Government and gets laid by extending very little energy by a number of women who seem surprisingly out of his league. His lesbian fetish is particularly confusing.
Then there are the sex scenes – the first being so soon into the book I felt as though I hadn’t been sufficiently introduced to the character to see him with his pants off. And this book worships the male member. Everyone seems to want Jimmo’s – I’m not sure why, but he’s a big hit with the ladies.
This book will no doubt be enjoyed by the blokes. I’ve seen one review on Goodreads that likens it to “X-files meets Penthouse Forum”. I would agree with that – minus the X-Files. This is a male fantasy read and nothing more.
Incidentally boys – if bum scratching is a sign of the dreaded butt chip implant, you are all in a pile of trouble.
1 out of 5 itchy butt chips.